Illinoise
It's official: I'm moving to Illinois. It feels kind of nuts. And maybe that’s one of the reasons I'm doing it.
Weekly Three
HEAR: “Chicago” by Sufjan Stevens.
READ: Sam Khan on the move away from a shock-based aesthetic and the rise of “wisdom art.”
VIEW: Men in suits in pools.
No. 59: Illinoise
PERSONAL NEWS! My girlfriend and I are moving to Illinois.
Whaaat? Same. It feels kind of nuts. And maybe that’s one of the reasons why we’re doing it.
But the main reason is straightforward. It’s stupidly expensive to live in the bay area.
You might argue it’s worth it. And you’d be right.
This place is a literal paradise. There’s nothing like it.
But just because it’s worth it doesn’t mean I can afford it. At least, not without renting. And renting doesn’t get me any closer to being able to afford it. And so, you see, the vicious cycle must end.
That means this Mexican-American, California native, ex-San Diego beach bum, outdoor lover, sunbather, bike rider, city appreciator, avid swimmer, mountain hiker is going to Illinois, USA, a.k.a. the Land o’ Lincoln.
It’s scary, to be sure! California is all I’ve ever known, and I’m totally and completely in love with this place. It’s not perfect, but it’s pretty close.
I could go on and on about the merits of California. But why? Anyone who has been here knows it’s spectacular. I certainly do. Should that stop me from experiencing any other place?
I’m embracing this change — this departure from my comfort zone. It will force personal growth, a change in perspective, a shuffling of priorities. I’ll be pushed to new plateaus mentally and physically (especially physically when it’s subzero outside and I obstinately decide to go on a bike ride). I see it as a kind of character building experience, an interesting and unexpected chapter in the novel of my life, the one where the sunkissed Californian is suddenly transported to the snow-swept landscape of the midwest, and he is confused, and he is cold, and he’s wandering around innocently looking for a decent burrito, and we know, but he does not, that he will never, ever find one.
So why Illinois?
My girlfriend, Grace, is from a town outside of Chicago. If I must be away from my family here, we will at least have her family there. Plus it’s a good place for her to finish nursing school. Plus I can afford a house next to a lake. Plus Chicago is cool. Plus it’s a nice state, as good as any in the United States (besides the Golden State, of course).
I’m ready for a new adventure, and this is the one that makes the most sense right now.
It would be irresponsible not to include this added consideration: I’m severely deprived of world travel. While Grace does her thing in Illinois, I can catch a plane somewhere knowing she’ll have her family nearby while I’m gone (read: reduced guilt). It’s been far too long since I’ve left the country. Italy is calling.
I wonder how it will be? I wonder how cold I’ll be? I wonder if, during the winter, I’ll write and read more since going on outdoor adventures will be harder? I wonder if that’s bogus and I’ll just strap some cross-country skis to my feet and go wild anyway? I wonder, I wonder, I wonder.
But I know one thing: The sudden awareness of our quickly approaching departure has recharged and intensified my appreciation of this gorgeous state. As a lucky Californian, I’ve been so regularly blessed with natural beauty and perfect weather that unknowingly I’ve come to think of them as commonplace. They’re not. The beauty here is truly special. And I know now, more than ever, that we should never take the splendor of this coastal state for granted.
In this, there’s a universal lesson. It’s the same lesson Leonardo DiCaprio’s character wished he could have learned earlier (rather than just before being obliterated by an Earth-killing shockwave) in the movie Don’t Look Up.
“We really did have everything, didn’t we?” he says to his family and friends as his house collapses around him. “I mean, when you think about it.”
We really do have everything. I’ve Illinois to thank for teaching me that, and I haven’t even made it there yet. ♦
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